In our current society, many has developed a life style that can be categories as a constant race. This bring some interesting questions. In this race, against who are we racing? For what purpose? or because of what reasons? The fascinating thing about being in a constant race, is that you do not really have the time to stop and think about it. It is part of the intrinsic problems of living such a reality. When we do have the time and we stop for a moment, those questions look so complicated that we just let them be and continue to race.
In this post, I would like to share with you how I manage to personally find some sense in it. In the reality, I always knew that no hard questions exists when it comes to humans, it is just that we don’t like the answers…..so it becomes complicated. In my personal experience, I manage to tackle this issues, by confronting a very simple question, Why am I doing things to start with? Unfortunately, many people I spoke with about the subject, don’t really have a good answer for that. Why?
In my opinion the answer is quite simple. It is because we do not understand why we believe in things and for what purpose. the good news is that we can change it. It could sound like a hard task at first, but I can reassure you it is not. In the reality, it is a matter of perspective. We can think forward or backward. This distinction really makes a difference. Like any other habit, it is a matter of practice and persistence. I start using it and it changed my life.
Thinking forward can be explain as followed: A way of thinking that is taking in consideration only a limited information about the past concentrate in the present for the sake of avoiding an unwanted future. While thinking backward can be explain like that: A way of thinking that is taking in consideration the future consequences of our actions concentrating in the present possibilities for the sake of avoiding past mistake and promoting the best possible future outcome. Please take a moment……a few minutes or hours as well…..and try to understand how to you normally think.
I took the time to think about it and realized that the majority of the things that I do, are all falling under the thinking forward philosophy. Moreover, I realized that most of this decisions are made because of a blank belief that dictates, that it is important that I do it from the first place. It is important to keep your job, to be part of society, to obey authority, not to be to different, to be a good person, husband, friend and coworker. In the bottom line, it is important to be what you are expected to be and not change how you used to be. Even if you don’t enjoy it, don’t agree or don’t fully understand why….Just continue. We have grown to call it order.
This affect greatly the individual self esteem, his capacity to be creative and flourish. We all require self motivation. It makes us better, stronger and happier. Moreover, we all need to give ourselves a good explanation about what we are doing. I think it is a built in aspect of being a human. Doing things because you have been told to, can give some comfort in the short run, as no decision making have do be made by the individual itself. But in the long run, this behavior make us weak, miserable and depress. I will argue, that one of the reasons so many people today are suffering from depression in the west, is due that reasons.
Doing things out of a deep understanding of what we are trying to achieve is extremely important. Not only because it allow us to make it better, but because it give us control on our own mind. So what is important? well, it is extremely subjective. I believe that each person need to understand it by himself. Nevertheless, there is some guideline that can feet us all. For example, to understand what is important, try to ask yourself what is the purpose of your actions from the first place. Ask yourself if this purpose promote an actual value that you believe in. try to think about where the actions of today will bring you in 5 years from now.
Another way I found to be efficient is to look at what I think is important today and try to put it in a 5 years perspective in a backward thinking. When I’m convinced that something is important I ask myself….In 5 years from now when I will look back, would it really look important or make a difference?
Things that we are doing because we are told to, are good in small doses. But poisonous in big one. If we obey the rules because we need, go to vote, maintain the job we don’t like, maintain relationship we do not enjoy and keep a routine that do not promote our happiness. We lose one of the main aspect of what make as great as human. Many people call this behavior been a sheep, which I disagree with. While it is true it have some similarities, as humans that live that way just walk after the leader to slaughter. From the other side, For the majority of their lives, cheep look quite happy, or at least not depressed.(I actually observed sheep quite a lot in my childhood).
Thinking backward is not rebellious or chaotic, it is liberating and motivating. Understanding what is really important for you, gives new meaning to life and build automated self confidence. Give it a try, let me know how it worked for you.
Share you thought with me in the comment section and express your opinion. Awareness and open conversation are the key for the creation of a better future.
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